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I'm having trouble getting triggered


Dear Network Doctor

I'm a 35-year-old who is struggling to get released and it may take 3-4 hours before I arrive. I am in a relationship with a lovely woman and we talk about it and have tried different things and methods to see if there is something that works, but unfortunately not. My boyfriend can not handle it in the long run, and we have agreed that it is her who controls how long she can handle it. It's not because I'm not on and it feels like I'm "coming" several times without losing the erection, but I'm not spraying. We are extremely active 2-3 times a day, sometimes more, we have intercourse where my girlfriend has to take a break. However, if we have had a break 4-5 times, I will come quickly. Can you help with anything?

Sincerely, one asks


Dear Questions

Delayed ejaculation is a well-known problem in sexology - but the causes of the problem can be many. Certain medicines (such as "happiness pills") may make it difficult to get ejaculation - and you may also have problems with the release if you are inhibited / unwell / stressed or have previously had unpleasant or direct traumatic sexual experiences. Or if you really do not want or have problems in their relationships. Finally, low levels of male hormone (testosterone) in the blood can make it difficult to get ejaculation, but then the problem will often be accompanied by difficulty in breathing. None of the parts seem to be the case for you, and I immediately have no good explanation of your problem.

In addition, it might be nice to know a little more about you and your sex life: How long has the problem been? Has it always been like that or is it something new? Is there also a problem when / if you masturbate? Is there a problem every time - or only when you have had sex many times in a row? How are your relationships inside and outside the bed? And are you generally happy and happy with yourself, your life and your body? You have sex quite frequently - and as you know, it's not uncommon for it to take longer to get released every time you've had sex. Is it possible that some of the problem is because you have sex so often that your "system" can not, as it were, "keep up with"? Maybe, as an experiment, you could try to get togethers once a day? Or maybe skip one day over and over again? At the same time you describe that you can sometimes get orgasm without accompanying semen - and there are actually some men who know about it. In some cases, the phenomenon causes the sperm to erroneously run back to the bladder instead of out of the urethra opening - but in most cases there is no good explanation.

Some men are fond of the "dry" orgasms - and in so-called "tantric sex" you actually train to get orgasm (s) without seat drainage. Summaries: With the available information it is impossible for me to get your problem closer, but 3-4 hours are long to have sex before you arrive. It's really nice, you have an open relationship with your boyfriend, but I still think you should seek professional help to better uncover the background to your problem. I think you should start talking to your own doctor about the matter. The person may have a sense of sexology - or at least know which referral options are available in your local area. You are also welcome to write again if things are in the hair.

Good luck

Christian Graugaard, doctor, PhD

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